Film Review: PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES (USA 2017)

Deadlines to Submit your Screenplay, Novel, Story, or Poem to the festival: http://www.wildsound.ca

pirates of the caribbean 2017.jpgCaptain Jack Sparrow searches for the trident of Poseidon.

Directors: Joachim Rønning, Espen Sandberg
Writers: Jeff Nathanson (screenplay)
Stars: Johnny Depp, Geoffrey Rush, Javier Bardem

Review by Gilbert Seah 

 The 5th instalment of the PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN franchise has been delayed a year and then another to be finally released this year after budget and script problems. It is easy to see why. The film like most sequels comes across as louder and bigger but not necessarily better. Written by Jeff Nathanson based on a story by himself and Terry Rossio, the story is a narrative mess and all over the place. In the parts where it is barely coherent, the special effects and swashbuckling action totally destroys whatever left as a thread of a story.

The film begins with a boy rowing a boat into the vast ocean. A huge ship scoops the boy up from underwater where the audience learns that the boy is seeking his father (Orlando Bloom) to return home. The father is under a curse and the boy vows to seek the Trident of Poseidon which returns power to the seas and break the curse that prevents the father returning home. The film then jumps 9 years into the future. The boy is revealed to be now grown up as the handsome Brenton Thwaites who is locked beneath the ship after warning the captain of dangerous waters that no ship has ever come back from. When imprisoned, the ship is attacked by ghosts. Henry is met by an evil, hissing ghost by the name of Salazar (Javier Bardem). He is apparently a powerful and maniacal undead pirate hunter of the Spanish Navy who was trapped in the Devil’s Triangle. After escaping, he seeks the Trident of Poseidon to wipe out all piracy and exact revenge on Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp). He asks Henry to pass the message to Sparrow that he is looking for him as he cannot relay the message as dead men tell no tales. Of course, all this make no sense. The story then jumps to anther point. jack Sparrow is robbing a bank.

No one really cares what happens. A female character Carina Smyth (Kaya Scodelario) is further introduced into the story to form the romantic interest for Henry, who also ends up seeking that dreaded trident. To form a strong female presence in the film, she fights for women’s rights to study in the university at that time.

When Johnny Depp is not appearing half the time behaving as if he was drunk or high, the pirates are swinging all over the ship and beating each other up. Lots of props get wrecked with lots of pyrotechnics thrown in. The camera swirls around for no reason – to the sky, to the sea down to the vast expanse of beaches.

The film’s best segment which occurs at the start when Sparrow falls asleep during a bank heist is quite over-the-top, but the the rest of the film never matches that part.

It only took ten minutes of the film for boredom to set in and the film lasts a full 2 hours and 20 minutes. The few cameos of Paul McCartney and Kiera Knightley do not enliven the film either.

This should finally be the last tired entry to a tired series. Jack Sparrow and gang should be forever banished to the Devil’s Triangle. In this film, Sparrow is supposed to have lost his mojo and getting it back with Poseidon’s Trident. No kidding about that loss of mojo.

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KrGyD4kHTSE

 

Also, Free logline submissions. The Writing Festival network averages over 95,000 unique visitors a day.
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Happy Birthday: Johnny Depp

johnnydeppHappy Birthday actor Johnny Depp

Born: John Christopher Depp II
June 9, 1963 in Owensboro, Kentucky, USA

Married to: Amber Heard (3 February 2015 – present) (filed for divorce)

Read reviews of the best of the actor:

A Nightmare on Elm StreetA Nightmare on Elm Street
1984
dir. by Wes Craven
starring
Amanda Wyss
Depp

Alice in Wonderland Movie PosterAlice in Wonderland
dir. Tim Burton
Stars
Mia Wasikowska
Depp

PLATOONPlatoon
1986
dir. Oliver Stone
Starring
Charlie Sheen
Willem DaFoe

Cry Baby
1990
dir. John Waters
Cast
Depp
Amy Locane

EDWARD SCISSORHANDSEdward Scissorhands
1990
dir. Tim Burton
Starring
Depp
Winona Ryder

Ed WoodEd Wood
1994
dir. Burton
starring
Depp
Martin Landau

DEAD MANDead Man
1995
dir. Jim Jarmusch
Starring
Depp
Crispin Glover

Fear and Loathing in Las VegasFear and Loathing in Las Vegas
1998
dir. Terry Gilliam
Cast
Depp
Benicio Del Toro

SLEEPY HOLLOWSleepy Hollow
1999
dir. Tim Burton
Starring
Depp
Christina Ricci

ONCE UPON A TIME IN MEXICOOnce Upon a Time in Mexico
2003
dir. Robert Rodriguez
Starring
Antonio Banderas
Salma Hayek
Depp

THE CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARLPirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
2003
dir. Gore Verbinski

Finding Neverland
2004
dir. by Marc Forster
Starring
Depp
Kate Winslet

Charlie and the Chocolate FactoryCharlie and the Chocolate Factory
2005
dir. Tim Burton
Starring
Johnny Depp
Freddie Highmore

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's ChestPirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest
2006
dir. Gore Verbinski

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN AT WORLD'S ENDPirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End
2007
dir. Gore Verbinski
Starring
Deep
Keira Knightley

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
2007
dir. Burton
Starring
Depp
Helen Bonham Carter

PUBLIC ENEMIES Movie PosterPublic Enemies
2009
dir. Michael Mann
Starring
Johnny Depp
Christian Bale

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus Movie PosterThe Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus
dir. Terry Gilliam
Stars:
Christopher Plummer
Lily Cole
Heath Ledger

The TouristThe Tourist
dir. Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck
Stars:
Johnny Depp
Angelina Jolie

MOVIEBLOW
2001
dir. Ted Demme
Starring:
Johnny Depp
Penélope Cruz

RangoRANGO
dir. Gore Verbinski
Stars:
Johnny Depp
Isla Fisher

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger TidesPirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
dir. Rob Marshall
Stars:
Johnny Depp
Penélope Cruz

MOVIE POSTERTHE RUM DIARY
dir. Bruce Robinson
Stars:
Johnny Depp

movie posterA NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 6
1991
dir. Rachel Talalay
Starring
Robert Englund
Yaphet Kotto

MOVIE POSTERHUGO
dir. Martin Scorsese
Stars
Asa Butterfield
Chloë Grace

MOVIE POSTER21 JUMP STREET
dir. Phil Lord
Chris Miller
Stars:
Jonah Hill
Channing Tatum

MOVIE POSTERDARK SHADOWS
dir. Tim Burton
Stars:
Johnny Depp
Michelle Pfeiffer

MOVIE POSTERTHE LONE RANGER
2013
dir. Gore Verbinski
Stars:
Johnny Depp
Armie Hammer

MOVIE POSTERWHAT’S EATING GILBERT GRAPE
1993
dir. Lasse Hallstrom
Stars:
Leonardo DiCaprio
Johnny Depp

MOVIE POSTERTRANSCEND
ENCE

2014
dir. Wally Pfister
Stars:
Johnny Depp
Kate Mara

TAKE A LOOK AT 100 PHOTOS OF JOHNNY DEPP

SEE – 2010 PHOTO

SEE – 2011 PHOTO

SEE – 24 JUMP STREET PHOTO

SEE – ABS PHOTO

SEE – ALICE IN WONDERLAND PHOTO

SEE – AND KIDS PHOTO

SEE – ANGELINA JOLIE PHOTO

SEE – ANIMATION PHOTO

SEE – BACKGROUND PHOTO

SEE – BARBER PHOTO

SEE – BATMAN PHOTO

SEE – BEACH PHOTO

SEE – BEARD PHOTO

SEE – BEFORE AND AFTER PHOTO

SEE – BEFORE NIGHT FALLS PHOTO

SEE – BENNY AND JOON PHOTO

SEE – BLACK BEARD PHOTO

SEE – BLONDE PHOTO

SEE – BODY PHOTO

SEE – BOOTS PHOTO

SEE – BUTT PHOTO

SEE – CALENDER PHOTO

SEE – CAPTAIN PHOTO

SEE – CARTOON PHOTO

SEE – CLOSE UP PHOTO

SEE – CROSS DRESS PHOTO

SEE – CRY BABY PHOTO

SEE – DARK SHADOWS PHOTO

SEE – DAUGHTER PHOTO

SEE – DEAD MAN PHOTO

SEE – DESKTOP PHOTO

SEE – DILLINGER PHOTO

SEE – DON JUAN PHOTO

SEE – DONNIE BRASCO PHOTO

SEE – DRAWINGS PHOTO

SEE – EDWARD SCISSORHANDS PHOTO

SEE – EW PHOTO

SEE – EYES WATSON PHOTO

SEE – FACE PHOTO

SEE – FACIAL HAIR PHOTO

SEE – FAMILY PHOTO

SEE – FASHION PHOTO

SEE – FEET PHOTO

SEE – GANGSTER PHOTO

SEE – GIRLFRIEND PHOTO

SEE – GLASSES PHOTO

SEE – GOATEE PHOTO

SEE – GQ PHOTO

SEE – GUITAR PHOTO

SEE – HAIR PHOTO

SEE – HANDSOME PHOTO

SEE – HAT PHOTO

SEE – HEADSHOT PHOTO

SEE – HIGH SCHOOL PHOTO

SEE – HOT PHOTO

SEE – JACK SPARROW PHOTO

SEE – JEANS PHOTO

SEE – JEWELRY PHOTO

SEE – KATE MOSS PHOTO

SEE – KEITH RICHARDS PHOTO

SEE – LIPS PHOTO

SEE – LONG HAIR PHOTO

SEE – MAD HATTER PHOTO

SEE – MAIRE CLAIRE PHOTO

SEE – MIDDLE FINGER PHOTO

SEE – MODEL PHOTO

SEE – MUSCLES PHOTO

SEE – NAKED PHOTO

SEE – NICOLAS CAGE PHOTO

SEE – NOSE PHOTO

SEE – PENELOPE CRUZ PHOTO

SEE – PEOPLE PHOTO

SEE – PIC PHOTO

SEE – PIRATES PHOTO

SEE – PLATOON PHOTO

SEE – PONYTAIL PHOTO

SEE – POP STAR PHOTO

SEE – POSE PHOTO

SEE – PREGNANT PHOTO

SEE – PREMIERE PHOTO

SEE – PROFILE PHOTO

SEE – RED CARPET PHOTO

SEE – RIDDLER PHOTO

SEE – ROLLING STONE PHOTO

SEE – SEXY PHOTO

SEE – SHIRT OFF PHOTO

SEE – SHOES PHOTO

SEE – SHORT HAIR PHOTO

SEE – SMOKING PHOTO

SEE – SUNGLASSES PHOTO

SEE – SWIMSUIT PHOTO

SEE – SWORD PHOTO

SEE – TATTOO PHOTO

SEE – TEENAGER PHOTO

SEE – TIM BURTON PHOTO

SEE – TUXEDO PHOTO

SEE – VANESSA PARADIS PHOTO

SEE – VANITY FAIR PHOTO

SEE – WALK OF FAME PHOTO

SEE – WALLPAPER PHOTO

SEE – WIFE PHOTO

SEE – WINONA RYDER PHOTO

WATCH TOP JOHNNY DEPP MOVIE SCENES

10. NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET, 1984 – Watch Depp bed and blood scene

9. ED WOOD, 1994 – Watch Depp in drag scene

8. FEAR AND LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS, 1998 – Watch Depp opening scene. As Hunter S. Thompson

7. SWEENEY TODD, 2007 – Watch singing Depp

6. SLEEPY HOLLOW, 1999 – Watch Johnny Depp sex scene with Christina Ricci

5. BLOW, 2001 – Watch Johnny Depp as George Jung

4. PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN, 2003 – Watch Depp the Pirates playing Jack Sparrow

3. EDWARD SCISSORHANDS, 1990 – Watch Johnny Depp as Edward the cutter with Winona Ryder. Snow scene

2. PUBLIC ENEMIES, 2009 – Watch Johnny Depp sex scene with Marion Cotillard

1. THE ASTRONAUT’S WIFE, 1999 – Watch sex scene with Charlize Theron

BONUS VIDEOS:

JOHNNY DEPP ARSENIO HALL – Watch 1991 interview promoting Edward Scissorhands

DEPP TRIBUTE – Watch Johnny Depp Tribute Video

Movie Review: ALICE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS (USA 2016) **

Deadlines to Submit your Screenplay, Novel, Story, or Poem to the festival: http://www.wildsound.ca

alice_through_the_looking_glass_poster.jpg
ALICE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS (USA 2016) **
Directed by James Bobin

Sarring: Mia Wasikowska, Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter, Anne Hathaway, Sacha Baron Cohen, Rhys Ifan

Review by Gilbert Seah

Based on Lewis Carroll’s ‘Through the Looking Glass”, the sequel to ALICE IN WONDERLAND entitled ALICE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS is produced by Tim Burton but the director’s reins are now taken over by The Muppet’s James Bobbin. Burton’s dark first film is replaced by glowing dizziness, all shiny stuff and sparkles, delivering a louder and glitzier Alice. Which one is better? Critics have been divided roughly 50-50. But both films had the common trait that the plot’s logic is largely incomprehensible.

When ALICE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS opens, the titles inform that the ship Alice Kinsleigh (Mia Wasikowska) is captain of, is sailing the Straits of Malacca in the year 1874. To those rusty with their geography or history, the straits is the narrow sea separating the west of West Malaysia (known at that time as Malaysia) and Sumatra, Indonesia. It is the time when trade was opening between Britain and the East Indies. Alice is supposed to be prospering in trade. But now, she is pursued by pirates. The pirates are inserted, perhaps to whet audience’s appetite for a new version of PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN from Disney. Alice’s ship escapes, thanks to the magic of CGI but she returns to more trouble in London, England.

The plot involves a few different stories. One is her losing her independence and her ship to a former suitor, Hamish (Leo Bill). But Alice escapes through a looking glass back into Wonderland where she meets her old friends Tweedledee/Tweedledum (Matt Lucas from LITTLE BRITAIN), the White Rabbit (Michael Sheen), the Cheshire Cat (Stephen Fry) and the White Queen (Anne Hathaway). Everyone appears worried about the depressed Hatter (Johnny Depp), and the White Queen dispatches Alice to travel back into the past to save his family. So the second story involves Alice stealing time in the form of a gyroscope under pursuit by Time (Sacha baron Cohen) himself. The other less interesting one has the red queen (Helena Bonham Carter) dealing with her evil issues.

The humour is very, very mad and all over the place. Imagine sitting in a room having tea with a bunch of crazies or on an uncontrollable acid trip. Johnny Depp is in home territory here.

Sadly, the film’s most interesting segments are Alice’s problems back in reality dealing with her mother’s contract to Hamish and how she deals with them. It is when Alice goes to Wonderland, which is the majority of the picture, is when the film gets too crazy.

All the gaudy excesses cannot hide the fact that a film with a convoluted and confusing plot results in a less satisfying entertainment – whether a dark or glossy look is used to disguise it. Both ALICE fins fail to hit the mark. And the film contains too many puns on the word ‘time’.

The film is lovingly dedicated to Alan Rickman who voiced Absalom, the blue butterfly that leads Alice to the magical looking glass. It is funny that Rickman should be remembered by his last film a a blue butterfly than in his first film and best role in DEEPLY, MADLY, SWEETLY.

 

 

Also, Free logline submissions. The Writing Festival network averages over 95,000 unique visitors a day.
Great way to get your story out: http://www.wildsound.ca/logline.html

Deadlines to Submit your Screenplay, Novel, Story, or Poem to the festival:http://www.wildsound.ca

Watch recent Writing Festival Videos. At least 15 winning videos a month:http://www.wildsoundfestival.com

 

DISNEY’S “ALICE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS” PRESS CONFERENCE AND PHOTO CALL

Director James Bobin, producers Tim Burton, Suzanne Todd, stars Johnny Depp, Mia Wasikowska and Sacha Baron Cohen from Disney’s “Alice Through The Looking Glass” joined press for tea and a photo call today at the Corinthia Hotel in London.
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Cast: Johnny Depp, Anne Hathaway, Mia Wasikowska, Rhys Ifans with Helena Bonham Carter and Sacha Baron Cohen

Voice Cast: Alan Rickman, Stephen Fry, Michael Sheen, Timothy Spall

Director: James Bobin                            

Producers: Joe Roth, Suzanne Todd and Jennifer Todd, Tim Burton

Executive Producer: John G. Scotti             

Screenplay by: Linda Woolverton

Based on characters created by: Lewis Carroll

OFFICIAL BOILERPLATE:

In Disney’s “Alice Through the Looking Glass,” an all-new spectacular adventure featuring the unforgettable characters from Lewis Carroll’s beloved stories, Alice returns to the whimsical world of Underland and travels back in time to save the Mad Hatter. Directed by James Bobin, who brings his own unique vision to the spectacular world Tim Burton created on screen in 2010 with “Alice in Wonderland,” the film is written by Linda Woolverton based on characters created by Lewis Carroll and produced by Joe Roth, Suzanne Todd and Jennifer Todd and Tim Burton with John G. Scotti serving as executive producer. “Alice Through the Looking Glass” reunites the all-star cast from the worldwide blockbuster phenomenon, including: Johnny Depp, Anne Hathaway, Mia Wasikowska and Helena Bonham Carter along with the voices of Alan Rickman, Stephen Fry, Michael Sheen and Timothy Spall. We are also introduced to several new characters: Zanik Hightopp (Rhys Ifans), the Mad Hatter’s father and Time himself (Sacha Baron Cohen), a peculiar creature who is part human, part clock. 

                 

Alice Kingsleigh (Wasikowska) has spent the past few years following in her father’s footsteps and sailing the high seas. Upon her return to London, she comes across a magical looking glass and returns to the fantastical realm of Underland and her friends the White Rabbit (Sheen), Absolem (Rickman), the Cheshire Cat (Fry) and the Mad Hatter (Depp), who is not himself. The Hatter has lost his Muchness, so Mirana (Hathaway) sendsAlice on a quest to borrow the Chronosphere, a metallic globe inside the chamber of the Grand Clock which powers all time. Returning to the past, she comes across friends – and enemies – at different points in their lives, and embarks on a perilous race to save the Hatter before time runs out. Presented in Digital 3D™, Real D 3D and IMAX® 3D, Disney’s “Alice Through the Looking Glass” opens in theatres on May 27, 2016.